Every few weeks I seem to totally forget that when the vacuum cleaner bag is getting full the vacuum cleaner will not work properly. I look at the indicator, I look inside the bag and both tell me it is about half full. So I continue to try to get more in it. I struggle getting any dog hair off the rugs; I swear, sweat and possibly scream a little. I think I need both a new vacuum and new rugs. Then finally, I change the bag and things start to work again. Turns out that, sometimes half full is full enough.
Why is it so difficult for me to accept that?
Why do I continue to force-feed the dust bag?
I have learned from Koelle Simpson, my Equus Coaching teacher, that the way we do one thing is the way we do everything. I know this is true. I have seen it in many areas of my life as well as in the lives of my clients.
So the question is, where else in my life am I refusing the change the metaphorical dust bag?
I know that the answer will dawn on me. You see, we only realise the existence of our patterns when we are ready to fully see them. Seeing some patterns will directly release them, others require more attention.
Vacuuming is easy when the dust bag is empty, the more dust you have collected the more difficult it gets. I realise that this is my recurring theme – the struggle for struggles sake. The underlying cluster of my core beliefs causing this pattern relate to the idea that only challenging, difficult things are worthwhile, that I really have to earn my right to exist.
This belief has shown up in my life in different ways. I am often making things more difficult than they need to be. I have noticed this pattern in several different situations, and I have released layers of the underlying beliefs. However, I haven’t been able to let go of it completely. It is like a bad habit. I realise how significant of a role it has played in my life. I know that I do not consciously believe that things have to be hard, or that I have to earn my right to exist. I just still occasionally fall into this habit. I am seeing it earlier every time, and soon I will notice it before it causes me to struggle. Eventually it will become a funny memory.
Shining light on our patterns will make us conscious of them, and allow us to drop the ones that are no longer useful.
Are you noticing any areas where you are following a pattern that doesn’t work for you?
Often it is easier for us to see, and release our patterns when we talk about them with someone else. I have discussed my patterns on several occasions with my coach, and know that it can be really helpful.
Let me know if you wish to have some assistance with identifying your patterns. I can help you take that one important step back to allow you to see the complete picture.